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| Triangular theory of love developed by psychologist Robert Sternberg. The triangular theory of love characterizes love in an interpersonal relationship on three different scales: intimacy, passion, and commitment. Different stages and types of love can be explained as different combinations of these three elements; for example, the relative emphasis of each component changes over time as an adult romantic relationship develops. According to the author of the theory, psychologist Robert Sternberg, a relationship based on a single element is less likely to survive than one based on two or more. The Eight Forms of Love Combinations of intimacy, passion, and commitment |
1. Nonlove is the absence of all three of Sternberg's components of love.
2. Liking in this case is not used in a trivial sense. Sternberg says that this intimate liking characterizes true friendships, in which a
person feels a bondedness, a warmth, and a closeness with another but not intense passion or long-term commitment.
3. Infatuated love is often what is felt as "love at first sight". But without the intimacy and the commitment components of love,
infatuated love may disappear suddenly.
4. Empty love: Sometimes, a stronger love deteriorates into empty love, in which the commitment remains, but the intimacy and
passion have died. In cultures in which arranged marriages are common, relationships often begin as empty love and develop into
one of the other forms with the passing of time.
5. Romantic love: Romantic lovers are bonded emotionally (as in liking) and physically through passionate arousal.
6. Companionate love is often found in marriages in which the passion has gone out of the relationship, but a deep affection and
commitment remain. Companionate love is generally a personal relation you build with somebody you share your life with, but with
no sexual or physical desire. It is stronger than friendship because of the extra element of commitment. The love ideally shared
between family members is a form of companionate love, as is the love between deep friends or those who spend a lot of time
together in any asexual but friendly relationship.
7. Fatuous love can be exemplified by a whirlwind courtship and marriage in which a commitment is motivated largely by passion,
without the stabilizing influence of intimacy.
8. Consummate love is the complete form of love, representing the ideal relationship toward which many people strive. Sternberg
cautions that maintaining a consummate love may be even harder than achieving it. He stresses the importance of translating the
components of love into action. "Without expression," he warns, "even the greatest of loves can die" (1987, p.341). Consummate
love may not be permanent. For example, if passion is lost over time, it may change into companionate love.
Developed by Robert Sternberg
Referenced:
Robert J. Sternberg, "Triangulating Love", in T. J. Oord ed. The Altruism Reader (2007) p. 332
Robert J. Sternberg, "A Triangular Theory of Love", in H. T. Reis/C. E. Rusbult eds., Close Relationships (2004) p. 258
2. Liking in this case is not used in a trivial sense. Sternberg says that this intimate liking characterizes true friendships, in which a
person feels a bondedness, a warmth, and a closeness with another but not intense passion or long-term commitment.
3. Infatuated love is often what is felt as "love at first sight". But without the intimacy and the commitment components of love,
infatuated love may disappear suddenly.
4. Empty love: Sometimes, a stronger love deteriorates into empty love, in which the commitment remains, but the intimacy and
passion have died. In cultures in which arranged marriages are common, relationships often begin as empty love and develop into
one of the other forms with the passing of time.
5. Romantic love: Romantic lovers are bonded emotionally (as in liking) and physically through passionate arousal.
6. Companionate love is often found in marriages in which the passion has gone out of the relationship, but a deep affection and
commitment remain. Companionate love is generally a personal relation you build with somebody you share your life with, but with
no sexual or physical desire. It is stronger than friendship because of the extra element of commitment. The love ideally shared
between family members is a form of companionate love, as is the love between deep friends or those who spend a lot of time
together in any asexual but friendly relationship.
7. Fatuous love can be exemplified by a whirlwind courtship and marriage in which a commitment is motivated largely by passion,
without the stabilizing influence of intimacy.
8. Consummate love is the complete form of love, representing the ideal relationship toward which many people strive. Sternberg
cautions that maintaining a consummate love may be even harder than achieving it. He stresses the importance of translating the
components of love into action. "Without expression," he warns, "even the greatest of loves can die" (1987, p.341). Consummate
love may not be permanent. For example, if passion is lost over time, it may change into companionate love.
Developed by Robert Sternberg
Referenced:
Robert J. Sternberg, "Triangulating Love", in T. J. Oord ed. The Altruism Reader (2007) p. 332
Robert J. Sternberg, "A Triangular Theory of Love", in H. T. Reis/C. E. Rusbult eds., Close Relationships (2004) p. 258